Being Moody

You may have noticed the little yellow face in the left and if you have been paying attention you might have noticed that it changes at best several times a day. I’ve been trying to notice my feelings and it does good to me.

I have to admit that my feelings are often blurry. I have a bit of an attention problem and paying attention on my feelings is not easy, so punkymoods have been great exercises. It gives a possibility to went out feeling whit-out always needing to write them down. Lately my feelings have been rather blurry and writing light-hearted quite difficult.

My mother seems to blame others for her feelings. I’ve been learning that much – especially lately – that I know that there is only me to blame. It is wisdom gained in the hard way. Sometimes there may be other culprits for ones feelings as well, but in my case the greatest blame lays on me. When I’m feeling low it is my inner demons that haunt me – not some aliens.

I don’t know if it is a short of maturity, but I have realised I need to take responsibility of my feelings. I can’t blame others, like my mother does, because it is not fair to them. I am firm believer of fair in all things and especially in relationships. Blaming others for something they cannot influence is wrong. It is strange, when one understands one has gained maturity beyond ones own parents.

I think many women have tendency of blaming men on their feelings and forcing men to carry the responsibility of how they feel. My mother was no exception, although my daddy tried to avoid it best he could. Men can be moody too, but they avoid others more than try to make them take responsibility. Yet I have to admit, I wouldn’t mind to cuddle when I am feeling low. Men don’t seem to understand that sometimes best way to solve a problem is to give a bear hug.


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