Why Are We Making It So Difficult?

Fifty year ago marrying was simple business – people met and got married. Then they lived simply together until the end of their lives. If they ended up divorcing behind of it was something very difficult, like family violence, cheating or heavy drinking. Continue reading

End of the Year 2008

Most of the second half of 2008 my life evolve around work (a lot of new and stressful things), my mother (who I’ve been worried about) and my god daughter, who will soon be half year old. I have to admit I am besotted. She is a little darling. Continue reading

No Looking Back

I always blamed myself for killing the blooming romance. There have always been easier women around and usually the men around me have not been up to challange I present. I wonder if it has been partly due their own immaturity as well as mine. When they’ve started to date someone else and I’ve relaxed around them, they’ve suddenly became interested again. For me that is no-no situation. Continue reading

The Truth in Old Photos

It is revealing to see old photos. After decades one can watch them almost as an outsider, while it is otherwise impossible to dive in the past as it was. You only know it through your emotional memories. The photos are revealing a frozen past. Continue reading

Love Shy

My problem with men has been a special kind of shyness or social fear. I am afraid of sexual chemistry and behind it are my bad experiences. I know it makes me difficult to interpret, because I am not otherwise excessively shy. It often happens that men I am not interested in find me easier to approach than those that I find fascinating. It usually take time to trust and feel comfortable around them, but most men are not that patient and I can understand them. Continue reading

Excessive Daydreaming

It may sound funny, but I truly think that I should dream less and live in reality little more. The idea came to me, when I was thinking of a man I know and like. Always before I’ve let my dreams run wild: designing the family and kids, thinking up the weddings. And sometimes I have had difficulty to separate my dreams from reality. Continue reading

In the Meanwhile (for only those curious of my whereabouts)

While I feel like nothing has happened, during the time I was away from here, there has been those moments. First I’ve heard that I’ll be godmother. He/She should born one of these days. I like children and while not having any of my own godchild is a good substitute. I have felt little left out in fact, because many of my friends have had plenty of godkids. This is my first. Although one old friend (long time not seen) told me that she could have written the same story: for years no godchildren and then in the few years several. I wonder… Continue reading