Never Been Truly Desperate Since

Worst moment in my spinster “career” was when I hit 24  – the traditional age of spinsterhood in my culture. I felt I needed to find a man, right there – right then, and it led me in short of trouble. (I had a male friend, who got the same panic at the age of 25, but did not wake up and ended up married, and I’m not very sure, how happy he is now. Last time I saw him he was missing his lost youth).

My moment of desperation lasted few months in that spring, then it was over. Men can smell desperation, I suppose, so nobody was interested in me, while I panicked. I was interested in any kind of reasonable guys.

I learned my lesson soon afterwards, when I found out a lot of uninteresting guys dangling after me. I had given them come on, while I panicked, and they followed it, after they could feel my desperation was lifted.

O’boy was I in trouble – and could only blame myself, because I had let these guys on. I am nice girl and don’t want to hurt anybody, but unintentionally, because my silliness, ended up doing exactly that. It was good lesson. Never been desperate since.


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